How We, As Muslims, Experience America
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+This response will be the hardest because of the bitterness I feel toward this country. "The land of the free,
+American women have chosen or accepted Islam through research and understanding and not by force or influence from their husbands. Just because there is a story of one crazy Iranian who abused his family-even if it is true doesn't mean the whole country is like that. I urge people to think about what kinds of abuse and molestations go on here every second! I urge the American people to use their God-given brain and not to sleep through life!
+It gives me great pain to know that Muslims and Islam are so terribly misunderstood by the majority of Americans, which gives rise to hatred, dirty looks, and rude comments, which impedes our rights as Americans to practice our religion freely. This country was founded byHow could our sweet daughter do anything as bizarre as this? Both my husband, Joe, and myself were deeply hurt. Certainly, Jodi did not want to hurt us-but she had-and we were unable to understand what she had done. We were numb, but we were also angry and not sure we wanted our daughter as a part of our family. A decision would need to be made. Should we just consider she was no longer welcome in our home and treat her as if she were dead?
Jodi was not the first daughter who had disappointed her parents by making a decision contrary to their tradition. In fact, daughters and sons rarely make decisions that are completely in harmony with parental wishes. Oftentimes we have discovered the parental response is "get out and never come back; you are dead to our family." We were very fortunate that we were able to resist such a temptation. It could be worked out. As a family we would try to understand, and in trying to understand, we also have journeyed on another path and discovered a way of life which although strange to Americans, is wholesome and fulfilling for many of those who have chosen the Muslim experience.Part of the discovery was that the media portrayal of Islam which is generally negative, does not often view the positive kinds
Choosing Islam in America is not an easy path. Muslims are considered to be strange by most Americans. Wearing a scarf; refusing social drinks, not gambling, not being patriotic to the United States or Canada-those are not ways to win friends. Some seem to dismiss those who convert as just "not very smart." A study of Muslims in this country would no doubt reveal a very high number of professionals-doctors, engineers, nurses, professors, business men and women, teachers-along with blue collar workers, students, and homemakers.
The prevailing view by many Americans is that Muslims are terrorists, and they are quickly blamed whenever there is an act of terrorism. This prejudice has resulted in many attacks on Muslims. Following the bombing in Oklahoma City, in April 1995, Muslims across the country suffered personal indignities as the media quickly blamed the attack on Muslim terrorists. Many Muslims were spit on, crudely addressed, threatened, or in other ways put down as if they were responsible for the bombing just by being Muslim. Such behavior may not represent the bulk of the American population; however, it does demonstrate a certain bias against a religious minority in this country.
The United States of America was founded by those seeking the opportunity to worship freely and according to their own desires. We who are citizens of the United States have been quite proud of our history of religious freedom. Whether or not we intend to allow that freedom to be equally shared will be tested as Islam and other Eastern religions begin to grow and take their place in this culture. Islam is one of the fastest growing religions on the North American continent, and it is important to know and understand these people who seek to live and find happiness among us.
In our walk, we have discovered many wonderful people trying to live full and abundant lives by trying to eliminate the mediocrity of the present-day culture and attempting to bring up their children to respect God and the rights of others. The choice was there to accept or reject, and thanks be to God, we decided to take the road of acceptance. It has been an exciting and fulfilling journey sharing with and learning from these daughters of another path.
TO: American-born women who have converted to Islam
FROM: Carol Anway, a parent whose daughter, Jodi, converted to Islam and Jodi Tahireh Mohammadzadeh, the daughter who converted
RE: A research project to foster understanding of the choice to convert to Islam and the effect of that choice on one's life
DATE: September 1993
Friends and acquaintances are familiar with the book and movie, Not Without My Daughter, and other articles that are very negative. They do not understand the strength and quality of life Jodi and her other American Muslim sisters have in their Islamic commitment. We want to share a more realistic image by gathering and sharing some of your stories through a descriptive research and possible articles or book.
Carol, the director of the research project, has a master's degree in education/counseling. Jodi is working on her master's degree in nursing. We will be assisted by a small group of American-born women who have converted to Islam and are professional educators.
This is a cross-sectional study of women in major urban areas of the United States and Canada. The study is based on those American-born women who have converted to Islam and wear the covering (hijab).
The purpose of this study is to explore and describe the effect that conversion to Islam has had on the lives of American-born women and their families. We want to emphasize the positive aspects as well as acknowledge stresses that have occurred. We hope, through the writings that will result from this study, to encourage the families of origin of American Muslim women to work through their struggle to understand and accept this choice to convert to Islam.
The data in the attached questionnaire contains both objective and subjective questions to answer. This will assist you in describing your experiences as a Muslim woman.
The questionnaire collection period has been extended from May 15 to June 15 but we would like for you to send your completed questionnaire to us as soon as possible.
We want to reinforce the confidentiality of this project. Carol will be the only one who will know what name goes with what data and will be very careful to keep what you share separate from your name. However the data gathered will be used in articles and possibly a book to reflect the data and stories collected.
If you have any questions about the study, please call Carol at 816/2527541 in the Kansas City area.
Sincerely,
Carol Anway and Jodi Tahireh Mohammadzadehby Carol Anderson Anway and Jodi Tahireh Mohammadzadeh
Directions: Thank you for your willingness to respond to this questionnaire. There are two parts to it. The first and last pages are easy-just collecting information. The rest of the pages present questions for you to respond by writing down your own experiences.After filling out page one, respond about your own personal experiences using the questions in small print to guide your responses where appropriate. You may write in the spaces on the questionnaire or on separate sheets of paper.
Please feel free to make copies of this questionnaire and introductory letter to give to other American-born women who have converted to Islam. Encourage them to fill it out and return it within 6 weeks after receiving the questionnaire.
I. STATISTICAL DATA
Age---- Vocation-------- Work Status ------------II. YOUR CONVERSION TO ISLAM
Describe the process of your conversion to Islam.
What was your religious commitment prior to converting to Islam and the extent of that commitment?
Describe the changes that you needed to make in your life as a result of your conversion and practice of Islam. Were there areas left behind that caused you grief and loss?
How has this change helped you be what you wanted to be? What has been (or is) the most meaningful part of Islam for you?
IV. YOUR FAMILY OF ORIGIN
What effect has your choice to be Muslim had on your relationship with your parents and other family members?
What do you hope for in regard to your relationship with parents or family?
What were or are the main points or events of stress (if any) with your family of origin?
2. Tell about the effect your daughter's conversion and commitment to Islam has had on the family.
3. What do you hope for in regard to your relationship with your dz"ghtz in the future?
4. What were or are the main points or event of stress with your daughter (and husband and grandchildren if applicable)? 5. How do you manage the celebration of traditional holiday times? 6. How are you included in their Islamic celebration or how do you wish to be included? 7. What are the difficulties or pleasure for you when your daughter (and her family, if any) visits in your home or you visit with them? 8. If your daughter is married to a Muslim, tell about the experience of that event for you.9. At the present time, what are your greatest concerns regarding your daughter and her conversion?
10. What effect, if any, has this experience had on your theology and religious commitment?
